Choice A: Good pain : Choice B: Bad pain

I really don't to want either, but if I have to chose, well I guess I am learning that the good pain is more productive, even though it hurts...greatly. So in my group, well, I will not reveal real names, but let's just say that we all are in the learning process. Each of us needs the support for us to grow. There is something about accountability when attempting to grow in good pain and not to go back to the bad pain patterns. So what is pain anyway and why do we have to experience it. The definition of pain according to the Oxford English Dictionary is "The state or condition of consciousness arising from mental or physical suffering; distress; an instance of this." What I like about this definition is that it includes mental suffering, not just physical. This word was first recorded in 1375 and spelled "payne".

So with this background information I can look at my pain in a fresh way, sort of like wow, I am going to be conscious when I experience it! I am going to feel it! I will remember it!! So then I can help someone in their journey because I remember! Like Jesus, when Peter tried to get him to avoid suffering, Jesus calls us to embrace it. Matt 16:24-25 "Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it." So we can't just confess that Jesus is the Messiah, but we must understand that this also involves suffering and death. We have to realize that we are going to pay the same price. We don't know the extent of the suffering, but we know we will suffer. So how do we go through it? Jesus went through it without sin and with obedience. Heb 5:7-8 "During the days of Jesus' life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death, and he was heard because of his reverent submission. Although he was a son, he learned obedience from what he suffered."

Now we chose good pain over bad pain, because that is the only choice, there is no option C. It is either A or B and how to know the difference. Well the bad pain comes from repeating old patterns. Say for example, I am always screaming "Victim" "I am the victim." I will view my entire life through that lens and always wake up in pain, bitterness, anger and all the while my heart just can't experience joy, no matter what I do. No one tells me, "Leslie you are just repeating the same patterns, move on, let go, you must face your own character faults." And reminding me, with love, I should be looking at my suffering with the question, "what can I learn from this?"

I believe Jesus meant for the church to do this for each other. The hard stuff of confronting in love, accountability. Of course it is not easy, but love isn't described as easy!
These are just a few examples of how I can grow in a good way through pain:

Take risks being more honest
Taking risks in relational confrontation
Dealing with trauma and pain from the past
Learning to grieve
Learning to forgive
Learning to reconcile difficult relationships


Now the bottom line on pain? I like to think of it this way, sort of like going to the gym with the ultimate trainer. You see at the gym,you are paying the trainer to get you in shape. Is the trainer going to say, "oh you know, your stomach is fine, let's just leave it, you seem to be okay with it and the work will be just too hard!" My experience is the experts never are satisfied with leaving anything as is and are there to challenge you to be better!

So yes, you guessed it we have spiritual muscles! And guess what? God, the expert, loves me more than my personal trainer! (I know, Shock!) So why are we surprised knowing that Jesus suffered and that our spiritual muscles only grow through pain, like our physical muscles! And God doesn't want to leave us "going through the motions" on the treadmill of life, He wants us all, completely, given up to Him. Yes, you guessed it again, we can't learn that if we just chose to stay on the treadmill and never go out and try the other machines and classes!

Let's embrace the pain, so that we too can experience more of Him in our lives and then learn how to stop the pain that comes from addictions, repeating old patterns, avoiding growth and the pain that comes from avoiding pain. Most importantly help others through their pain by giving them hope, the Hope of Jesus!

Don't be a reluctant sufferer like Peter, take the challenge and strengthen those spiritual muscles! Join me, the cost of this membership is priceless!